Daily Random Smack

Sodastream

2007-03-05T15:41:00.000+11:00

Sodastream play Keith and Tina at thier last ever show.

Patti or Fatty?

2006-10-25T08:58:00.000+10:00

Finally I thought of a story.

A couple of weekends ago I was at a friends 21st (Randy's). My group was the very first to arrive so we were just wandering around and dancing to pass the time (actually it was just me dancing while the others watched). I was really breakin' it down on the DF (dance floor). He had a good setup outside, with carpets on the dirt and couches spread around. But I did have one issue with the setup; it was no good for break dancing. How can one get good rotation on carpet? I tried to spin on my head but after about 3 or 4 rotations, the carpet slowed me down to much so I had to stop. I suggest that next time he has a party, he finds some floorboards and makes a section of the garden the 'break dancing section'.

After about 20 minutes other people started to arrive. The first was a couple who was related to Randy in some way. I had never seen them before so I went over to introduce myself. I sidled up to the male and shook his hand. He told me his name (I can not remember what it was, something ordinary), and then I told him mine. It was a bit difficult to hear because the music was loud, but I clearly said 'Micah'. He looked at me with a puzzled expression on his face and said, 'Wanker?’ He thought that I had told him that my name was Wanker! I cast my mind back and I remember one other time that someone thought my name was Wanker.

I was in year 8, and for someone so small, I had a lot of attitude. But, there were a few guys on my bus with more attitude than me. One of them was in year 9 and his name was Sam. He thought he was pretty tough so he had shoved his way to the back seat (even though it was only for year 11 and 12). He shouted at me, 'Whats your name?' I gave the usual response, 'Micah'. He then shouted 'Wanker?' He also may not have heard me correctly, but I told him about 5 more times and he kept repeating 'Wanker'. So, from then on I was called 'Wanker' by him.

Anyway, this got me thinking. Even if the guy at the party had heard me wrong, what made him say 'Wanker'? Who would really think that someone would introduce themselves as Wanker? If, for instance, someone introduced them self to you as Patti, and you did not hear properly, you would not look at them and say 'Fatty?’ It is just so incredibly rude. I don't mind if he couldn't hear me properly, but he could have at least asked me my name again. How the hell could he think that anyone would introduce themselves as 'Wanker'? People can be so rude.

Thats my story.

5 reasons why Latrobe is better than Melbourne

2006-10-09T15:43:00.000+10:00

These are in no particular order...

1. It only takes half an hour from when I leave home to when I walk into the classroom. When I went to Melbourne it took over an hour and a half. I would walk to the station (30 min), catch the train (45 min atleast) then the tram and walk (atleast 15 min).

2. Latrobe accepted me into an Arts degree and Melbourne did not. It still makes me a little angry when I think about it. I was already at Melbourne and my marks were not that bad. How difficult is it to just move me from science to arts? They wanted a 78% average. That is serious smck. It took Latrobe about 5 minutes to decided that I was accepted.

3. One must complete only 7 subject units to get a major at Latrobe, but one has to do 9 at Melbourne. This means that at second and third year level, I only have to do 3 subjects a semester instead of 4. This is atleast 3 less contact hours and tens of hours less in reading and essays and such. It also means that everything is a lot less stressful.

4. The staff at Latrobe appeared to be much much more interested in my predicament. They sat down with me and explained what I needed to do and they were generally a lot more helpful. After I got rejected for Arts at Melbourne I went in to try and talk to some people. I spoke to a lady who is on the Arts board and she just bluntly said that there is nothing I could do. She actually suggested that I move institutions. She did not care about my story and about how stuck I was. She told me to get 80%+ then they might consider me for the end of second year but by then it would be far too late.

5. I made about 4 'friends' in my one and a half years at Melbourne, and even that I found quite diffucult. At Latrobe there is Megan.

Do the 'Kangaroo Hop'

2006-09-17T14:47:00.000+10:00

Anyway, I was driving home the other night on mine road and there was this kangaroo hopping in the middle of the road. I slow down and this creature keeps jumping in the middle and it refuses to let me pass. Finally I see it moving to the side of the road but then it stops. I stop the car just in case it starts moving on the road again. It then proceeds to turn around and it begins to eye me off. My high beams were still on, so maybe it was not actually eyeing me off, it could have just been blinded and confused. So I roll down my window and say to it:

'Hop on over to the edge
stop breakin' it down on the road
go on, jump off the ledge
or I will squash you like a toad

so jump jump around

kick your feet up off the ground

spin spin and do a little jig

go on and have a dig

dance on over in the bush
leave me and my car alone
or I may flatten you like mush
then I will be the one who owns'

He does not move, but continues to look dazed and confused. It then jumps straight into the side of my car and proceeds to jumps away! So much attitude coming from such a stupid creature. It may have won this battle, but we will see whos laughing when I eat him for dinner.

Einsatzgruppen

2006-09-08T11:01:00.000+10:00

When one thinks of the holocaust, they generally think of extermination camps and gas chambers. These are, of course, important events of World War Two and the genocide that occurred, but much less is known about the other methods the Nazis used to murder millions of people. The einsatzgruppen is one of those other ways.
The einstazgruppen was originally established to assist the Wehrmacht (German Army) in completing the rounding up of political opponents, partisans and other noncombatant personnel in Nazi-occupied Austria, Czechoslovakia and Poland in 1938-39. But it was during the German invasion of the Soviet Union in 1941, (code named Operation Barbarossa), that this group gained notoriety for their actions. The SS needed large numbers of killers on the front to begin the enactment of the Final Solution. This new group was called the einsatzgruppen and numbered around 3,000 troops. These troops were split into four groups, with their main purpose being to follow the wermacht into Soviet territory and to kill every Jew that they could find. This mobile killing squad appeared to roam around in an atmosphere suggestive often of a kind of festive hunting party.
The einstazgruppen enlisted auxiliaries from various Eastern European nations to aid them in their cause. Together they engaged in one massacre after another. It is estimated that over 900,000 Jews were slaughtered by the einsatzgruppen between June 1941 and December 1942. In just two days in Kiev, the einstazgruppen filled a ravine with the bodies of over 33,000 Jewish men, women and children.
Over time, the act of continually shooting civilians led to the demoralization of the killing squad. The Nazi realized that a new, less personalized method was needed. Hence, gas chambers became the solution to the Final Solution.

The shaded area is where they did the majority of the killings.

JAR FACE

2006-09-06T11:19:00.000+10:00

I JUST DID A POO IN A JAR

I HOPE THAT ITS UP TO PAR

NOW I WILL GET INTO MY CAR

I DONT HAVE TO TAKE IT FAR

I WILL DROP IT AT THE BAR

HOPE I DONT HAVE SAR(S)

I ALSO MUST HAVE A BLOOD TEST

I KNOW MY BLOOD IS THE BEST

BECAUSE MY BLOOD IS INFEST(ED)

WITH HEPATITIS

Kung-Fu Fighting

2006-08-29T17:12:00.000+10:00

The kung-fu fighters are in the zone

moving to the target who they are about to pone

quick as lightening

and light as a hair

they spin around

and fly through the the air

CRASH BANG SLAM

they hit the baddie

his face smashes into the ground

they decimate

and captivate

and castrate

Flip kicks and upper cuts

the baddie no longer has nuts

EVERY BODY WAS KUNG-FU FIGHTING

Inside

2006-08-23T19:12:00.000+10:00

This song goes out to everyone

1-2, 1-2-3-4 Hit It!

I used to lift my head and search the sky
looking for the answers to my prayer
wanting to know why,
why no body seemed to care
my insides felt torn out
my tears, no body dried
I wanted to scream and shout
all I wanted to do was hide

One day I turned around
I saw my body sprawled on the ground
a helping hand was thrust my way
I looked away, didn't know what to do or say

You looked me in the eyes
saw me for who I really am
saw past the pain and lies
you whispered softly
and touched my face
your words, you spoke with honesty
I looked at you and cried

Your face was a vision from my dreams
your skin so soft, as though no seams
the sparkle of your eyes
the curve of your lips
the movement of your hips
had me mesmerised

You told me: 'it will be ok
I'm here now to take the pain away'

I believe you
and away goes my pain
I feel as though I'm learning
LEARNING TO LOVE AGAIN

Shak Attack

2006-08-22T16:38:00.000+10:00

Ladies up in here tonight
No fighting, no fighting
We got the refugees up in here
No fighting, no fighting

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man wants to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection

Hey Girl, I can see your body moving
And it's driving me crazy
And I didn't have the slightest idea
Until I saw you dancing

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel you boy
Come on lets go, real slow
Don't you see baby asi es perfecto

Oh boy, I can see your body moving
Half animal, half man
I don't, don't really know what I'm doing

Senorita, feel the conga, let me see you move like you come from Colombia

MY HIPS NEVER LIE

Beat of the Forest

2006-08-20T12:16:00.000+10:00

Clap your hands and start to dance
move to the rythm of the environment
remove your shoes and take off your pants
the bush is calling so grab a tent

livin' in the bush
amongst the trees
with the kangaroos and wombats
eating vegetable mush
sleepin' on a bed of leaves
catch and eat feral cats

so everyone do the rain dance
move to the beat of the drum
the sound of nature runs deep
wounded and dying
it needs everyone
awake from your sleep
and stop the hurt

the blood in my veins
pulses for the flame
that flickering flame
that sweeps away the old
dance for torrential rain
to dry up the parched ground

WE NEED THE RAIN SO EVERYONE DANCE

Pen,Paper

2006-08-19T11:16:00.000+10:00

Writing and rapping is my trade
my pen and some paper
are my only companions
this is my story:

Sittin' all alone
no one on the phone
my only muse
is my booze
sippin' out a brown paper bag
get my pen and scribble my tag
the pain I feel
rips my heart
makes me peel
writing is my only escape
I got no clothes
only my cape
a stone for my pillow
I am lower than an average Joe

The end is near
I shall not fear
for I have my pen
and my soul is on the paper

CAN'T YOU SEE? THIS IS IT, THE END

Democrats 4EVA

2006-08-15T16:40:00.000+10:00

I am a democrat
I love the U. S of A
Yeterday at work I sat
and earned a lot of pay
for doing not much at all

Singin'

'for I am a democrat
and my country looks after me
oh I love it passionatly
I want to be a democrat 4EVA
and I will never ever
leave the U.S of A'

I give my country a big A+
because we look out for the smaller nations
oh yes we are so generous
(and not to mention smart)

We have the greatest leader
the world has ever known
oh yes big G W is so good
he even has the respect of the hood
(pity his brains are made of wood)

Singin'

'I am a democrat
and I love the great United States
I also love eating MacDonalds
everyday I spend my pay
on fast food
because I am a citizen
of the greatest nation
and when I pick up that pen
I tick DEMOCRAT'

Thanks for the inspiration Bob. This is probably my best work.

Glimpse

2006-08-14T20:10:00.000+10:00

Drifting
Shifting
Sifting
through space
and time
and lime green forests
of oak
and birch
in spring I perch
and watch
and wait
for at winters end
I will take
and I will change
my dreams
and my ambitions
for a moment
for a split second
spent with her
the sacrifice may be great
but for that moment
nothing is too much

FOR IN HER EYES I GLIMPSE NIRVANA

Poem for the lost

2006-08-13T21:31:00.000+10:00

I'm tired
not wired
hope I dont get fired
then I would need to get hired

Its almost 10 o'clock on a Sunday
Tuesday night I get my pay
I wait all week
for the chance to speak
but when I get it
i dont know what to say

I am often at a loss
without my hugo boss
my confidence is shattered
my clothes are in tatters
ash and sackcloth I wear
for real, not for a dare
my appearance lacks care

PERHAPS I SHOULD GO EAT A PEAR

Thanks Steve

2006-08-11T16:40:00.000+10:00

Ob la di
ob la trobe
I'm da man wit' da hose
aint no point in bein jealous
I is simply jus too wicked

so listen up, JP
your love song is played
inda minor key
ob La trobe
ob la di

Smacked Up

2006-08-10T15:47:00.000+10:00

I'm a smacked up guy
livin' in a smacked up world
I have smacked up friends
(but not a smacked up girl)
I have a smacked up family
we live in a smacked up house
I go to a smacked up uni
with smacked up kids

There is so much smack
In my smacked up life

I MUST BE ON CRACK

2006-08-09T15:17:00.000+10:00

2006-08-07T14:03:00.000+10:00

I'm a rippin' dude
who spins some rippin' tunes
I bust moves on the street
spin on my head and kick up my feet
My hair is long and drippin'
I'm chanting and I'm singin':

'Here I am
take me now
hold my head up so high
my body floats, I can fly
head hurts now
too much, oh damn'

Stickin' it to all
moved above you
so can't make me fall
so sing with me

'skip skip skip to my lieu
dancin' and groovin'
to every breath from you
movin' and boppin'
till I reach the top'

CHECK IT ONE TIME OLD SCHOOL WIRED

I am sure that someone is interested...

2005-11-07T09:33:00.000+11:00

Victoria Bitter (fondly referred to as VB) is Australia’s favourite full strength beer. VB is a full flavoured lager (derived from the German word for storage), less malty in character and slightly darker than your traditional lager (Crown Lager, Melbourne Bitter, etc.). VB ‘proudly proclaims its characteristic maltiness with its full strength and full-flavoured palate’.

Victoria Bitter is brewed in a six part process and has been brewed this way since the 1890’s. It is brewed to certain specifications so the end product has the following figures:
Alcohol content: 4.9%
Carbohydrates: 3.1 grams/100 ml
Energy: 168 kilojoules/100mL; 40 calories/100mL
Standard drinks: 1.4 per 375mL, 3.1 per 800mL

The brewing process of beer in Australia has changed as the demand increased and ingredients and equipment improved. Early production in Australia was based on English methods of top-fermentation (the conversion of sugars into ethyl alcohol and carbon dioxide, through the action of yeast) where the yeast rises to the surface of the beer at the end of fermentation, is skimmed from the top and the beer sold without any maturation or storage. The Foster Brewing Company (established in 1888) and the New South Wales Lager Beer Company (established in 1896 at Waverley and taken over by Edmund Resch in 1900) pioneered a continental method of brewing where the yeast settles to the bottom of the vessel at the end of fermentation and then undergoes a storage period. The product is lager.

All beer can be classified as either a lager or ale. Whether the beer is a lager or ale depends on the type of yeast used in the brew and the temperature at which fermentation takes place. Ales are brewed with top-fermenting yeast which allows for quick fermentation at warmer temperatures. Being a lager, Victoria Bitter is brewed using bottom-fermenting yeast which ferments more slowly and at a colder temperature.

Victoria Bitter is brewed at the Carlton & United Beverages (CUB) brewery in Abbotsford. To brew the best beer, they use the best quality barley (known as malt) and the best water. Water and malt are the main raw materials to which are added hops (an herb which adds bitterness), yeast for fermentation and additives such as glucose. CUB uses six steps in their brewing process of Victoria Bitter.

1. Milling and Mashing
At the brewery, the malt is weighed, cleaned and passed through a mill. The malt is crushed in the mill to form what brewer’s call ‘grist’. This is done so that later water can more easily combine with the natural enzymes and malt starch. The grist is mixed with hot water – liquor – in a ‘mash tun’ (tank) and allowed to stand at a temperature which allows the malt starch to convert to fermentable sugars.

2. Lautering and Boiling
The mash is then moved to a ‘lauter tun’ where the liquid is separated from the grain husks. The sweet, non-alcoholic solution of grain sugars strained from the lauter tun is called ‘wort’ (pronounced ‘wert’).
The wort is then transferred to another tank called the ‘kettle’. Liquid sugars are added to the solution and steam percolators are used to bring the mixture to the boil. During boiling, the protein material in the wort coagulates to form ‘trub’ which must be removed. This removal is achieved by transferring the wort to a whirlpool which separates the trub from the wort.

3. Fermentation
After the trub is removed, the wort gets cooled by passing through a cooler and then the pure yeast is added. During fermentation, the yeast cells multiply and convert the fermentable sugars in the wort into alcohol and carbon dioxide gas. The fermentation vats at the CUB brewery are 3 ½ stories high and able to hold 665,000 liters of beer. The gas which is released creates a layer of foam on the top of the beer and is collected and purified for use at a later stage. For a lager, fermentation occurs at temperatures between twelve and eighteen degrees Celsius. Fermentation continues until only the non-fermentable sugars remain at which stage the fermentation tank is chilled to four degrees. The chilling of the beer stops the fermentation process and the yeast settles to the bottom of the vat. The yeast is removed and used again in further brews with the surplus ending up on our toast in the form of vegemite.

4. Maturation
After the yeast is removed, the beer is passed from the fermenter to maturation (storage) vessels. During this transfer, the beer is cooled to minus one degree. Hop extract, which gives the beer its bitter flavour, is added at this stage. Any material which might impair the appearance, flavour and shelf life of the beer settles out. The maturation period can last from eight to twelve days.

5. Filtration
Following a set time in storage, carbon dioxide gas is collected and added to the beer to gives its characteristic head and taste. The beer is then passed through a complex filtration system to remove surplus protein and yeast.

6. Pasteurisation
During pasteurisation, the beer is heated and then rapidly cooled to prolong the shelf life and destroy any bacteria or organisms in the beer. Canned and bottled beers are pasteurised in their containers.

The beer is now ready to be packaged into bottles, cans and kegs ready for distribution in Australia and exportation around the world. Labeling and packaging are done mechanically. The CUB brewery is able to fill and package 80,000 slabs (24 pack) in an eight hour shift using four production lines. When producing cans, they are able to fill 2000 cans a minute.

The end product is Victoria Bitter which is a beautifully crafted beer with the perfect combination of malt and hops. Pour it into a glass or have it straight out of the stubby or can, either way it is enjoyable. The ‘gentle fruitiness of the aroma compliments the sweet maltiness in the mouth which in turn, balances perfectly with the clean, but quite robust, hop bitterness of the finish’.

It is seriously a wicked fresh drop!!

Family

2005-09-12T14:55:00.000+10:00

I only got about 5 hours of sleep on friday night. I had to wake up early to get home so we could go to a family reunion. We were going to meet up with mums family (the Haldanes) in Gumbaya Park (the big peacock near warragul). Anyway, mum said that it was 'just past Berwick', but she lied. It was about 30 minutes from the Berwick turnoff. So we arrived and went to building J. I walked in and had a look around and then walked straight out again. I did not recognise anyone. It turns out that all the random people were mums cousins and thier kids (who have nits). I hate having strangers coming up to me and saying smack like "I remember you when you were this big...I used to carry you around". It annoys we because I can not respond. I felt like telling them that I remember them as children. Some guy called Stan! (the ! is because he is always just there), and he came up to me and said "now let me think...Mary, Harry and Barry (pointing at me and Haydn and Perrin)".
We ate lunch on a Wilkins table and then went on the toboggans. These seats that go down a concrete track. Me being the manly man that I am decided to go with no brakes. I crashed on the second corner and ripped my favourite pants. But it was worth it, it was wicked fresh. Perrin also crashed and ripped his jacket and bruised his hip. "I cant walk...I cant carry anything...I'm injured", Perrin always complains about injuries. Finally we left and drove home. We got home at 4.30 and had to leave at 5.30 for dads family reunion (my Nanas 85th, not that she would know...).
Mum, dad, Haydn and Perrin had to pack to go to Philip Island and mum also had to make some food to take to the Motes (the relatives house that we were going to). So, everyone is really busy and we get everything in the car ready to leave and then mum asks where Haydn is. I went to his room and he is asleep. He had not packed. Mum was not happy. Haydn has so much attitute, telling me he just wanted sleep.
So we got to the Motes (a palace in Kew with a pool and tennis court) and I went to retreve the chicken from the back seat. It had spilt everywhere and has left a nasty stain on the back seat and a funny smell in the car.
I have to go to class now but I will finish the story some other time. I dont like Wilkins family reunions.

Death

2005-08-18T08:29:00.000+10:00

At around 6.15pm last night I dropped my lady at her house. She lives in a place called Nutfield on a road called Mine Road which is a very narrow, zig zagging road. It was starting to get fairl dark when I said goodbye and turned around to go home. I had only gone about 200 meters when I went around a left turning corner. All I saw was this head and then BANG! I had crashed into a kangaroo. Forntunately I wasnt going very fast, only about 50 or 60 k's. Anyway, I stopped the car about 20 meters later and just sat there shaking. My first crash. After offering some expletives to the wind, I got out of the car and checked the damage. There are just a few dents near the passenger door and the indicator was hanging off (I managed to put it back on). Still freaking out, I reversed to car and checked out the damage on the kangaroo. It was lying in the gutter twitching. I had no clue what to do, so I went back and spoke Rod Smith. He drove me in his car to the scene and we shone the torch in its eyes. It was clearly dead. Bood trickling from its head. We just left it there and Rod was going to call the council or something to get it removed. Atleast I killed it and it wasnt in pain. I felt awful, it was such a big animal. I had to sit down for awhile before I was ready to drive home. Then on the way home I was freaking out because every rock and shadow I saw I thought was another kangaroo. Thats my story, now I'm off to the dentist. How do I take the overwrite off this?

A French Family

2005-08-13T16:57:00.000+10:00

Game

2005-08-07T14:02:00.000+10:00

Suppose that you are on a game show, and you are given the choice of three doors: behind one door is $1,000,000 and behind the other two doors are goats. The host (Monty Hall) knows which door hides the money and which doors hide the goats.

When a contestant picks a door (suppose #1), Monty ALWAYS goes to one of the other doors (say #3) and opens it, showing a goat. Monty knows where the money is. He NEVER opens the door the contestant picks and he NEVER opens the door with the money. Monty then asks if the contestant would like to stay with the original door (in this case #1) or would like to switch (in this case, to the unopened door #2).

Suppose you have picked door #1 and Monty has opened door #3, showing a goat. He asks you, "Do you want to switch to door #2?".

Are you more likely to win if you switch doors? Or if you don't switch? Or does it matter?

Back

2005-07-26T14:33:00.000+10:00

Its my second day back at uni. I really dont want to be back. Yesterday I joined the Liberal Club. Not for any political reason, but because I got free beer and free snags. They had Crownies! So exciting. I paid $5 to join and I definitly got my moneys worth. Today, Jebediah were playing and once again there was free beer and snags. I only know thier first album, 'Slightly Oddway' but they played thier most popular tracks. It was sweet.

For some random reason I am extremely tired even though I fell asleep at 9 last night. Home has been chaotic latley. There are 9 people living under one roof and in the mornings at breakfast it is crazy. I have no idea what the hell I am writing, just wasting time before my history tute.

I should stop now, this is a rubbish post.

Newcastle

2005-07-19T10:28:00.000+10:00

So many random things have happened recently.
I flew into Newcastle airport at 10 on saturday morning. The flight was ok, Jetstar is like a bus service. This old woman next to me offered me chewy and I took it even though I had my own. Anyway, the plane landed and I called my 'friend' immediatly to find out where he was. He was in Sydney, even tough he knew I was coming up. He just told me to get a bus to the central train station and wait for him. It cost me $25 to catch the airport shuttle bus, and it was only a 40 minute trip. Ridiculous. I just sat and waited for him and read my Rolling Stone (thanks perrin). Finally he rocked up and as soon as I saw him I realised this was a bad idea. Just one word for it...feral. He introduced me to some other random dreadlocked hippies and then we went to the 'Bat Cave'. A typical hippie commune. Save the tree banners everywhere, all the people were dreadlocked, and they all rolled thier own cigarettes. Something about there being too many chemicals in packaged cigarettes. This 'Bat Cave' place had some bad vibes. It wasn't the sort of relaxed atmosphere that I had expected, and the people weren't very welcoming. But I didn't make much of an effort. They all just talked about the 'action' in Melbourne and all the protests they went on and the Aboriginal tent embassy in Canberra where they were all tripping out on mushrooms. I don't have a problem with 'yandi' (Aboriginal word for pot) or mushrooms, but I cant figure out why protesting environmental issues and getting stoned go hand in hand. My 'friend' rode his 'pushie' from Newcastle to Canberra and then caught a train to Melbourne to attend the 'actions'. Apparently there were speakers who would rally the troops to go out into the streets and lock themselves to the BHP building. So, I just sat there in silence because I had nothing to say. I am usually very good at talking to new people, but I just went into a shell and became akward.
From there we caught a bus to my 'friends' house. He lives in a place with 9 other guys (not hippies). He unlocked his room and I wanted to throw up. It was disgusting and it stank. There wasn't even enough clean space to sit down. He proceeded to take off his shoes (throw up feeling again) and cut his toenails on the carpet. He found his towel somewhere under his bed and had a shower (his first in a month).
That night we ate out (hot chips and gravy) then went to the pub. He met some random people he knew so we talked to them. Princess Pelle and Shock. Princess is a 42 year old Tongan and Shock is...his name explains it. I got talking to him about his numerouse tattoos and he rambled on and on. He then started to do the 'Hai Hitler" and some dance moves. He also showed me the hand moves of the Egyptian Gods. Princess was flirting with my 'friend' and kept buying him smokes. She bought me two beers which was nice. We finally escaped and went back to his place. He made dreads for me which absolutely killed. It was the most intense pain I have ever been in. Grab some hair and pull it as hard as you can, the imagine twice that pain.
For breakfast I had a spoonfull of Nutela. We packed up his stuff because he was moving out. We went to the supermarket (my 'friend' hates supermakets, microwaves, technology, the goverment, electricity, showers, hygiene,etc). We bought: pumpkin, organic lentils, brocolli, carrot, brussel sprouts (feral), bread, orange juice, coconut cream, ginger and onions. Cooked up some curry, enough to feed us for the rest of the week. Just a pity that it was feral. That evening we had hot chips and gravy for dinner, then went to the 'Warehouse'. The 'Warehouse' is another hippie commune place in an empty shop. This place was better than the 'Bat Cave' but the vibes were not good. I didnt feel relaxed or at home. The 'doff doff' music didnt help (wheres Bob Marley?). A bong was going around which I passed on. Then my 'friend' decided to wander. It was now 7pm and he wanted to walk till 2am and then build a fire and sleep in a park. It would of been a good plan, but we only had what we were wearing. We started walking and after about an hour, he saw a sign that said 'Maitland 30km'. "Lets go there" he said. "Lets not" I replied. We stopped in a servo for some poweraid and then started walking back to town. I realised immediatly that we were going backwards but my 'friend' had no idea (even though the cars were now coming towards us). After a couple of km's I told him that we were heading back to town and he cracked it and made us turn around again. Anyway, I persuaded him to walk back to his room and we finally arrived at midnight. Bloody ridiculous.
Woke early and went to uni. My 'friend' didnt know his time table or anything. (This was on Monday and I hadnt showered since Thursday and I felt feral). Atleast we ate a decent meal with the Hare Krishnas at uni. We walked into his lecture and a minute later walked out. It was all a bit much for my 'friend'. Bought a towel and had a shower in the afternoon and I also vacuumed his room. In the evening I took all my stuff and moved to the 'Warehouse'. We were going to sleep there that night. Turns out my 'friend' was leaving for Canberra on tuesday even though I am not leaving untill wednesday.
So, I am sitting in the warehouse with Paul and Angie and they didnt even look at me. My 'friend' had pissed off somewhere else. They are in thier twenties and I asked them what they did inbetween protests. Suprisingly they do nothing. (I am being sarcastic). They just sit on their arses and get $400 a fortnight. Thats more than I earn. I told them I work at kmart and they scoffed at me, as if working for Coles Myer was the worst thing to do. They make me so angry. Why the hell should they get money? They dont even look for jobs, just move around attending protests.
I got over it and called dad. After a few phone calls, a car comes and picks me up from a random st corner. I go back to this
familys house (I had never met them) and I sit on the couch and Glen gives me a beer while his daughters (age 7 and 8) draw pictures of me. I had corn and a steak for dinner, and two glasses of red wine. So I am staying here till I leave tomorrow. They are all out at school and work so I have the house to myself. They are extremely nice people.
So, thats my life and thats my story.
p.s I am painstakingly ripping apart my dreads. It is hard work, but I realised that I love my hair too much to be able to cut it off when I am sick of the dreads. Best to undo them before the get too tight. I am losing alot of hair.

Lets break it down...old school

2005-07-09T12:35:00.000+10:00

Check it one time...

Sitting on the mountain side smoking a bidi
Always bludging from work, my name is K.P
not Killer Python,
watch out you had better run
from the smoke in your cupboard
is it a ghost, is it the Lord?
don't trip over the cord
its always lying on the ground
bodies scattered all around
tripping out on hate
always pushing, always shoving
not enough loving
boom, boom, the sound of a drum
every heart beats to the rythm
the tempo rises, heads are banging
cymbals are clanging
hair is dangling
power is surging from the amps
fire burning from the lamps
hallucinating
walls breathing, roofs closing in
too much gin, too much sin
black and white and shades of grey
even in the bright of day
is all people see
blinded
lost
what is the cost?
when will it end?
too far gone to mend
where is K.P?
still trying to light his bidi

Where the hell am i now?

2005-06-27T18:48:00.000+10:00

Don't say a brewery.

Heres the deal

2005-06-23T08:21:00.000+10:00

Ok. Its Thursday morning and I have another exam this afternoon. It should go alright, its only multiple choice. I had maths yesterday and it was awful. Terrible, useless, crap. There were whole questions that I couldn't do. I did some calculations and I probably passed...but only just.

Now, Haydn has been bugging me to get his name on my wicked site because apparently Perrin's name was used awhile ago. So, this morning everyone was up, getting ready for school or work (except me), and they weren't trying to be quiet. Haydn was walking around saying "eeee my names Haydn". So random! I yelled at him: "Shutup, I know your name's Haydn". All I got back was a muffled apology.

One thing that has been annoying me lately are my slippers. I have this pink pair that mum got second hand from a girl at her school. They are so feral and they reek. Whenever I wear socks in them, my socks come out stinking so bad. I actually can't find my slippers...maybe a good thing.

Funny story. Last week at work the only girl, (she's Asian..but that has nothing to do with the story), was sweeping up at the end of the day. She looked at me and said "Look how clean this place is". My reply was quick, "Look how clean your face is". Then I looked away and the next thing I heard was "do you want me to put it on you?" Freak me out! I looked up and she was shoving the broom in my face. I thought she wanted to put her face on me...

Anyway, my books are beckoning me. I think they feel lonely, shoved away under my bed.

A Random Smack Game

2005-06-16T20:54:00.000+10:00

We at DailyRandomSmack have decided to play a game, to test the knowledge of the readers. A new picture will be posted each week and readers have to guess where the photo was taken. There may or may not be prizes...So, DailyRandomSmack is proud to present the new game created by M.Wilkins called "Where the hell am I?".

There are three rules.

1. Only one guess each.

2. Anonymous guesses don't count.

3. Daniel N Parsons is not permitted to play because he knows the answers.

NO

2005-06-13T21:42:00.000+10:00

My exams start tomorrow. I have environmental change and its only worth 20% of my mark. I am fairly sure that I have enough marks to pass the subject even if I fail the exam so it is hard to find motivation. Plus it is only a multiple choice exam. But, I am so screwed for my maths exam which is on the 22nd. I will probably pass, but I have to do a lot of work. I reckon I can do about 30% of the semesters work.
There really isn't much to say. No funny stories (unless you find me being stuffed for exams funny...sickos...).
ARRRGGGG. I think I have forgotten how to cram. Last year my mind went dead. I didn't have to do any work, and even this semester has been breezy. I hate exams. They are so useless. I am not allowed a calculator on maths. When are mathematicians not allowed to use calculators? Ridiculous. Now I'm just ranting...should go to bed...wish me luck. cheers.

If anyone is interested...

2005-06-06T21:27:00.000+10:00

Firstly, a quick hello to Leah, Michelle and thier music class. I cant remember the other person I was supposed to say hello to...cheers.

This is my essay for Medieval Europe. I found it interesting, hope you do aswell. I hope that the people who read it learn something new. I think this stuff is important, it shaped the way church is today. Once again, I don't blame you if you don't want to read it. I probably wouldn't if it was on your site...

What was the Lollard approach to images of sacred subjects? How was this approach justified?

The church in medieval Europe had a profound influence on the lives of ordinary people. How one worshipped, and on what occasions, and to whom, were issues that the church hierarchy decided. Religious dissent was silenced. The authority and power of the church was rarely questioned. However, in medieval Europe some dared to discuss and debate issues of worship and faith. One important person who provided an impetus for change and renewal was John Wycliffe. His views were taken up by a number of people outside the church establishment who were called the Lollards. This brought them into conflict with the Church as they questioned a number of traditional beliefs and practices especially the approach of the Church to images of sacred subjects.

The Lollards were adherents of an English movement which was the offspring of the brilliant Oxford don, John Wycliffe (c. 1330-84). He was the Kings’ theologian and one of many who questioned the Church and how they conducted themselves. He accepted the Bible as one basis of belief, but demanded that it be placed in lay hands. The English translation is attributed to him, but it is far from certain that Wycliffe himself undertook the translation. It is likely that he just encouraged other people such as Nicholas Hereford to do it. Wycliffe’s secretary, John Purvey, furthered its progress by compiling a much more approachable translation of the Bible. Wycliffe influenced many people with his teachings including Jan Huss who acknowledged his teachings to of been inspired by Wycliffe.

It was not Wycliffe’s personality which launched the movement; it was his ideas. He rejected many aspects of the Church including the doctrine of transubstantiation, the worship of images and pilgrimages. He also placed a fanatical emphasis upon the need to disendow a rich and mundane clergy. He was convinced that everyone ought to have access to the ‘truth’ in his own language: ‘No man is so rude a scholar but that he may learn the words of the gospel according to its simplicity’. Wycliffe pointed out that the ecclesiastical establishment had considerable interest in not allowing the laity access to the Bible. The laity might discover the discrepancy between the lifestyles of bishops and those commended -and practised- by Christ and the apostles. Wycliffe increasingly came to see the church as the ‘synagogue of Satan’ and the Pope as the Antichrist. His ideas were such that he alienated himself from many of his supporters, but, his teaching helped prepare the way for the Reformation.

The term Lollardy was first used by the Irish Cistercian Henry Crump in 1382 to apply to the Wycliffite cell which was headed by Nicholas Hereford. The rise of Lollardy (from the Middle Dutch word lollaert which means ‘mumbler’ or mutterer of prayers) is attributed to John Wycliffe, but it was not until after his death that his doctrines developed a widespread appeal. This is somewhat due to vulgarisers and translators who wrote The Wycket and other English pamphlets which were falsely ascribed to Wycliffe’s own pen. Many of these booklets were passed and sold to the Lollards who were mainly lay people. Some belonged to the cloth trade; others were artisans or tradesmen with only a few being drawn from the merchant class. Women were also prominent in the movement.

The Lollards believed that God would ‘reform our church, as being entirely out of joint, to the perfectness of its beginnings’. They went back to the Scriptures to discover the person and spirit of Jesus. They believed that the church had departed from the teaching of the Bible and had become entangled in a system of abuse. Small groups of people read the Bible and some memorized passages because the manuscripts were not only expensive to buy but also dangerous to possess. They could find no warrant in the Bible for the emphasis on sacred subjects. They viewed images and pilgrimages as idols and had no patience with priestly or saintly mediators. They desired to hear the word of God and to keep it. Some Lollards were pacifists and others had a special concern for the poor.

In the last decade of the fourteenth century, there emerged in the House of Commons a vocal group of Lollards which included several of the household knights of King Richard II. It was this group who, in 1395, formulated the ‘Twelve Conclusions’. These conclusions of the Lollards were to linger up until the period of the Protestant Reformation. At the heart of the reform-demands were two chief teachings which were critical to Lollard partisans. These were that the ‘clergy should emphasise preaching rather than the sacraments and that the vernacular Bible should be placed freely in the hands of the laity’. More generally, the Conclusions may be summed up in four main tenets: the opposition to pilgrimages and the ‘idolatrous’ worship of saints and images, the denial of the sacrament of the mass and the miracle of transubstantiation, and the denial that confession to a priest is necessary for salvation.

Over the centuries, a view of the mass had developed. The accepted view was transubstantiation, in which the elements (bread and wine) are transformed into the actual blood and body of Christ through a priest’s ceremony. Over the centuries, church authorities had produced diverse accounts of the mystery.

The mass was performed by a priest, with his back to the people and often behind elaborate screens. He would speak in a language very few would of understood even if they had of been able to hear the words. The laity were encouraged to make prayers and readings which would have little relation to what was going on at the other end of the church. The mass embodied the clearest division between the clergy and the laity. The sounding of the consecration bell would tell the people that the bread and wine had been transubstantiated and the priest would turn so the people could adore the actual body of Christ. For the majority of Christians, the mass was a spectacle where attendance guaranteed a range of benefits such as freedom from ageing or freedom from sudden death that day.

The grounds for the Lollards rejecting the doctrine of transubstantiation as a necessary component were that they could not find any such teaching in the Gospels and that it was philosophically unsound. Wycliffe had urged that the body and blood of Christ were present in the eucharist not corporally but sacramentaliter, spiritualiter et virtualiter. Christ said ‘I am the bread of life. He that comes to me shall not hunger: and he that believes in me shall never thirst’ (John 6.35). There is no suggestion that devoutly watching the bread of life could be an appropriate response, rather, it had to be taken.

Lollards argued that when Christ broke the bread, He could have intended the disciples to understand that the bread remained bread while it became His body memorially. If this is how a sacramental sign works in the Gospels, and if this is how Christ chose to disclose His identity, then priests who asked Him to convert the bread into His body erred critically. Lollards believed that Christians are seriously misled if they believe that in the mass they are looking at Christ’s body elevated in the priest’s hands.

The church generated miracle stories of the eucharist which were full of examples to demonstrate that whoever questioned them were unbelievers, heretics or Jews. The issue of transubstantiation was being deployed as a test to determine whether a Christian was orthodox or heretical. Lollards cells or groups did not administer the sacraments, for that they went to their parish churches. They would show their disaffection by ‘sitting mum like beasts’ at the elevation of the host. They believed that whoever eats the bread and drinks the blood dwells in Christ and Christ in that person, but it is faith alone that enables this reception. It is not a priestly act or seeing the elevated host that can give eternal life. The Lollard’s justified their approach to the sacrament with Christ’s words at the last supper; ‘do this [eat the bread and drink the wine] for a commemoration of me’ (Luke 22.19).

One Lollard, Walter Brut expressed the view that the teaching of the Bible was clear concerning the death of Christ. He maintained that Christ’s sacrifice was offered once for the forgiveness of sins (Hebrews 9:28) and that the priests daily sacrifices could never remove the stain of sin. He denied that Christ was sacrificed over and over again during the sacrament of the altar. He also noted that in the early Church when the bread was broken there was no suggestion about the disciples sacrificing the body of Christ (Acts 2:42, 46).

Brut’s analysis of the sacrifice and his understanding of early Church practice was similar to the views expressed by Wycliffe, who suggested that if Christ was to return to the contemporary church he would be burned as a heretic. The Lollard’s view of this sacred subject was developed from their understanding of scripture which they believed had to be made available in a language that was freed from the control of the priests and translated into terms understood by the common person.

Another sacred image which was a touchstone of difference between the Church and the Lollards was the attitude to the cross. The Church believed that use of images was necessary for the growth of devotion of its members. There were possibly three reasons for the value placed on imagery; to fix the mysteries of the incarnation to memory, to instruct the simple and to increase devotion. Twice yearly a service was held where the people would creep to the foot of the cross to worship and have their sins forgiven. Kissing the cross brought special benefits to the worshipper. On one occasion, two Lollards were forced to carry a crucifix in their hands and kneel down and kiss it as punishment for believing that no cross ought to be worshipped.

Once, a rector of a church was sentenced to public penance for having prevented his parishioners from creeping to the cross on Good Friday, instead he kept them sitting in their seats. As far as the Church was concerned, honouring the cross was the same as honouring Christ. The cross represented the body of Christ that had been crucified and was also mysteriously physically linked since the blood of Christ had impregnated the wood. Behind this rite was the understanding of the true nature of worship. Some reservations were expressed about this worship. For example, the author of Dives and Pauper argued that believers should pray and worship before and not to imagery.

In this matter, also, Lollards were influenced by the teaching of Wycliffe. Under no circumstances was cross or image worship acceptable. One man, William Sawtry was quizzed as to whether he would worship the cross and he replied that ‘he would not worship the wood of the cross and would not waver from this even were the true cross right before him’. To the Lollards, the cross was just a piece of wood and that man and not the cross, was the true image of God. The Lollard’s justified their approach to both the image and cross of Christ by appealing to the scripture in Exodus 20. ‘Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image’.

For these views many Lollards were persecuted and since they did not have an effective national leadership which could have developed precise doctrines they never grew into a coherent movement. It was a scattered movement that coalesced around some key ideas that were expressed in the ‘Twelve Conclusions’. Sacred images and how one worshiped them in a Christian church may not appear to be of much importance to human kind in the twenty-first century, but to the Lollards these were life and death issues. The matters which they debated and discussed with the church hierarchy were the precursors to the reformation. Even though the Lollards died out, the Protestant church owes a great debt to their struggles.

Trendy

2005-06-01T19:35:00.000+10:00

It doesn't matter where you go, you will always see the same sort of trendy people. I don't care if they are Australian or European, I despise them. The strut, polo shirt turned up, the cut up jeans, the hair,...not to mention the freakin pink shirt. What do you think?

Pansexual

2005-05-25T16:04:00.000+10:00

According to the online dictionary, a Pansexual is someone:
relating to, having, or open to sexual activity of many kinds.

There is even a Pansexual Peace Party. The primary purpose of the PPP pages is to promote positive political progress and the partnership paradigm through prurient propaganda. More here.

At Melbourne University, there is a lot of debate about the new Pansexual toilets. These toilets are for males, females and for people who disregard gender and hence, are niether male or female. The Queer club at uni have been organising the Genderf*#k week. This is one of the activities:
We’re are socialised into our roles as ‘woman’ or ‘man’. Man, that sux! Today is the day to mess with the gender roles that stereotype us and restrict what we want to do. Come to uni dressed as an exaggerated ‘man’ or ‘woman’. i.e. cowboys, 50’s housewives, a pencil moustached dandy…Join us on the first floor of Union House for our pan-tastic party. We’re taking over the toilet!

Basically they are saying that we are all put into categories which are called binaries. These include male/female, straight/gay, big/small and black/white. Because we are put into these categories, we are not able to reach our full potential. More stuff here about the Queer group.

This is all very disturbing and I reckon the are all seriously messed up. What do you think?

2005-05-16T19:26:00.000+10:00

Does this look safe to you?

p.s Vote on the new poll.

Chill Pill

2005-05-14T15:58:00.000+10:00

Daniel made a comment about taking a chill pill for breakfast. It got me thinking. A lot of people use the term 'chill pill', but what is it? I did some research and found out that it is a Cool and Calm Herbal Supplement that has a natural non addictive formula intended to help calm and reduce the effects of stress and anxiety on the body.

You can even purchase a container of 60 tablets for a very special price of $5.96 (a saving of $1.49). Users are able to leave reviews and one person had this to say about the Chill Pill.

Before I started taking Chill Pills, I would get agitated by simple things. It could be as simple as seeing golf clubs in a place that I didn't like. But now, I feel much more balanced. Thank you Chill Pill.

So, if you are a someone who gets agitated easily, or if you have a friend or relative that gets agitated easily, then why not try the Chill Pill. It may help them.

If anyone is interested...

2005-05-08T17:57:00.000+10:00

This is my essay for Environmental Change which is due tomorrow. I will not be offended if no one reads it or comments.

Australian rivers have been exploited for the development of water resources and the environmental consequences of this are most marked in the Murray-Darling Basin. Outline the nature of the problems and critically review the strategies now being developed by the Murray-Darling Basin Commission (MDBC) to improve the environmental condition of the rivers of the basin.

The Murray-Darling basin covers approximately 14% of Australia’s area (MDBC 2005). The Basin consists of 30,000 wetlands and the three largest rivers in Australia, the Darling, Murray and Murrumbidgee. The Basin is defined by the catchment areas of the Murray and Darling rivers and extends into four states (Victoria, Queensland, New South Wales and South Australia) and the Australian Capital Territory (MBDC 2005). Since European Settlement, the number of fish, birds, plants and aquatic insects has declined due to a loss of habitat, lack of flooding, and loss of natural water temperatures (Anon 2004). But not only is the Basin the home for many animals, but it is also Australia’s most important agricultural region. Australia’s ‘food basket’ accounts for over 41% of the nations gross agricultural production (Crabb 1997). This is where the problems begin. Not only is there the environmental factor, but also the human usage (social factor) must be taken into account when creating policies.

Human activities encompass a range of different uses for the Murray-Darling Basin. These include irrigation for agriculture and graziers, and recreational use (swimming, fishing). Vast amounts of water is diverted for crops, irrigation and other human needs so that the Murray river outflow is only about 27% of what it was before European settlement (Collins 2004, Grose 2002). Channelizations, building of dams, increased sediment in the mouth, and river regulations are all causing the outflow to be so low (Boulton et al 1998). Irrigation salinity affects 320,000 hectares, which is 15% of the New South Wales irrigated surface. A further 174,000 hectares is affected by dry land salinity (Marsh 2000). The introduction of over ten non-native fish (MDBC 2005) and the building of dams have caused many problems for our native fish species. River regulation to suit human needs is the main reason for the increasing salinity levels and the depletion of fish stocks.

This is where the MBDC implements policies and strategies to try and rectify the problems. The Commission works with partner groups to develop and implement policies in accordance with the Murray-Darling Basin Agreement (MDBC 2005). The Commission is responsible for:
managing the River Murray and the Menindee Lakes system of the lower Darling River, and
advising the Ministerial Council on matters related to the use of the water, land and other environmental resources of the Murray-Darling Basin (MDBC 2005).

The problems and solutions concerning the Basin are different and complex. The MDBC must consider both the human needs and the environment in its policies.

This paper aims to outline some of the major environmental issues that are facing the Murray-Darling Basin and to critically review the steps taken by the Murray-Darling Basin Commission to rectify these problems.

Human needs

One of the main stumbling blocks to progress has been Australia’s devolved political system (Anon 2005). While there are substantial differences between political parties on issues of climate change, the Coalition, Labor Party and Greens are all committed to saving to save the Basin, but the amount of water to be saved is the distinguishing issue (Marohasy 2004). The allocation of water is a fiercely debated topic between political parties with the Greens pledging 3,000 gigalitres, the Labor Party 1,500 and the Coalition only 500 gigalitres. (Marohasy 2004)

The Murray-Darling Basin supplies water to homes, cities and farms throughout the four states that it encompasses. Different people have different water needs. Dams have been built to hold and supply water. Farmers need a lot of water for irrigation and they get water allocated to them depending on what the river flow is. Irrigation accounts for over 95% of the water use in the Basin (Boulton et. al. 1998). Currently, farms in this region are experiencing the ‘double whammy’ of drought and irrigation cuts for ‘environmental flows’ (Anon1 2005).

If the government allocates more water for agriculture and graziers, then the environment will suffer and conservationists will be angry. If more water is allocated for the environment, then the farmers will complain and crops will diminish. The issue of what to do with the water in the Murray-Darling Basin really is a ‘political hot potato’ (Boulton et. al. 1998).

River regulation

River regulation entails changing the river to suit human needs (Boulton et. al 1998). This is done by altering the flow or channel shape in some way. Channels have been straightened to enhance speed, dredged to remove friction from vegetation and dams have been built to hold water (Boulton et. al 1998). On the Murray- Darling system, there are now 30 dams with a gross capacity of over 100,000 ML (Crabb 1997). Over two thirds of the flow is diverted each year, with only one third reaching the sea (Collins 2004, Grose 2002). River regulation has obvious economic advantages, but there are also negative side-effects on the environment (Boulton et. al 1998).

Consequences of river regulation

Salinity

Increasing salinity is one of the primary concerns across the Basin (MDBC 2005). Soil salinity is a measure of the total amount of soluble salt in soil. As salinity levels increase, plants extract water less easily from soil, aggravating water stress conditions. The water table is now less than two meters below the surface (MDBC 2005). Salinity affects over 500,000 hectares of land in the Murray-Darling Basin (Crabb 1997). European settlers brought with them sheep, cattle and rabbits and also cleared land to plant alien crops. This has caused salt to rise to the surface, rendering land sterile and polluting rivers (Marsh 2000). Farmers and land owners cannot bear the costs of tackling salinity alone. As salinity levels rise, crop producing land is diminishing. Salinity affects over 15% of New South Wales irrigated land (Marsh 2000). The land affected by salinity is likely to rise by 300-500% over the next few years (MDBC 2005). By some accounts, salinity levels have stopped rising, but the damage has been done (Collins 2004).

State and Federal Governments, along with the Murray-Darling Basin Commission, have invested a lot of time and money in trying to solve the problem of salinity. In monetary terms, it is estimated that the annual agricultural cost is $130 million, $100 million in infrastructure costs and $40 million in environmental costs (MDBC 2005). Restrictions have been put in place to halt the clearing of native vegetation, which pleases the environmentalists but not the farmers. Farmers argue that non-native crops can work just as well and that there is ‘nothing magic about salinity’ (Marsh 2000). The Australian Government’s Natural Heritage Trust will invest $2.9 million over the next two years to implement a program aimed to reduce salinity levels by the development of forestry systems (Polglase 2004).

The Commission is implementing strategies such as:
A $2 million dredging operation which aims to move 400,000 cubic meters of sand from the mouth of the Murray River (Grose 2002).
Growing trees and improving crop management practises (MDBC 2005)
Improving flood runoff management (Webb 1994)
Ground water pumping to lower the water table (MDBC 2005)
Reducing the amount of water allocated to farmers so the rivers get more water flowing in them (Anon 2005)

The implementation of these strategies will work if there is cooperation between farmers, conservationists and the Government. All of the policies put forward by the Commission and Government, are in essence, trying to increase agricultural productivity and to increase the natural flow of the rivers. Diversion caps have been introduced so as to turn the trickle into a flowing river again (Boulton et. al 1998).

Depleted native fish species

Since European settlement, native fish species in the Murray-Darling Basin have suffered serious declines in both distribution and abundance (MDBC 2005). It is estimated that native fish populations are only one tenth of what they were pre-European settlement (Anon 2004).There are numerous reasons for this, including:
The building of dams. Some native fish migrate long distances but dams prevent this movement (Boulton et. al. 1998)
Changes to water flow and temperature (MDBC 2005)
Introduction of alien fish species (MDBC 2005)
The degradation of the Basin habitat

There are now almost 3000 barriers in the rivers of the Basin, but not even 25 of these have fishways (Boulton et. al. 1998). To combat this problem, newer and better fish locks have been opened. Locks 7 and 8 have just been opened on the Murray River, allowing fish to take their time to swim up through a series of pools in a gently sloping structure (Anon 2004, Luntz 2004). This ladder is the first in a series that will eventually provide 2300km of uninterrupted passage through to the sea from the Hume Dam. The $25 million works have been undertaken through the Murray-Darling Basin Commission and state governments (Anon 2004). These gates have seen many native species pass through, including perch, and smelt. But the fishways are not only used by native fish, alien fish have also taken advantage of them (Grose 2002). Introduced fish such as Carp and Gambusia are now the dominant fish in the Murray-Darling Basin (Boulton et. al. 1998). They have taken over the area that was once populated by native fish such as the golden and silver perch and the Murray Cod (Boulton et. al. 1998).

The Murray-Darling Basin Commission wants to rehabilitate the native fish species to 60% of the estimated pre-European level (MBDC 2005). The Murray-Darling Fish Strategy has thirteen objectives directed at improving the status of the native fish population and six driving actions to achieve the thirteen objectives. The six driving actions are: ‘rehabilitating fish habitat, protecting fish habitat managing riverine structures, controlling alien fish species, protecting native fish species and managing fish translocation and stocking’ (MDBC 2005). The Commission is very community orientated and tries to ensure community and partner ownership. According to the MDBC’s Native Fish Strategy manager, Jim Barrett, ‘1500 fish were recorded climbing the ladder [at Lock 8], including at least one threatened species’ (Luntz 2004).

Conclusions

There are many other issues facing the Murray-Darling Basin Commission, including an increase in algal bloom and erosion. All of these problems can be rectified by increasing the flow along the rivers. The Commission is has already placed a diversion cap on the Basin (Grose 2002), to try to decrease the amount of water which is being taken form the Basin. In 1950 about 3500 gigalitres of water was diverted, but now diversions exceed 12,000 gigalitres (Grose 2002). There must be an increase in the amount of water that is flowing in the Basin. More than 27% should be reaching the sea.

Long term fixes need to be implemented so as to halt the deterioration of the natural environment. The MDBC has implemented various strategies and policies to combat the problems that are facing the Basin. All political parties agree that more water is needed, but they differ in the amount they think is needed (Marohasy 2004). Everyone wants something different from the Basin (i.e. farmers want water for irrigation but environmentalists want the rivers to flow free again). The MDBC must create and implement policies and strategies that will save the Basin and they must also include our farms and agriculture in any policy.

The purpose of the Murray-Darling Basin Agreement is: ‘to promote and co-ordinate effective planning and management for the equitable efficient and sustainable use of the water, land and other environmental resources of the Murray-Darling Basin’. (Signed in 1987) (MBDC 2005)
But, more needs to be done by the Commission if we are to keep our most important agricultural resource and our most diverse ecosystem.

According to Peter Cullen, an internationally known scientist; ‘The MBDC has somewhat lost the plot. That is why the Prime Minister has established the National Water Commission, and given it $2 billion to get on with the job. It is urgent’. (Collins 2004)

Text Talk

2005-05-04T19:32:00.000+10:00

I found this note on the ground at the train station. I'm not sure if it is right for me to copy it here, but I will change the names so as not to incriminate anyone. I just think its disturbing how teenagers write. The language and spelling is awful. Its from writing too many text messages.

hey buddy...
Whats up?
I decided to write you anotha letta coz im bored in geogRaphy! How R yah? and wat class you in now? oh and wats happening wit tina*? Sport was really odd and akward. I still dont know what Kate* was going on about when she sed that in the moRning you go 'oh shit i got sprt now oh and i needa soRt shit out wit Laura*?' im confused. Oh and i think i can start to just let it all go coz when im wit tim* i dont even really think bout it and i kno i still like him....
(It goes on and on)
neways i got 2 go
so i'll c yah at lunch
byez

So, is it wrong for me to write this? My point is that the writing is terrible. I use proper words when I said text messages and I definitly use proper words in letters. Maybe thats just me. Check this out to find out how to text talk.

Goal

2005-04-28T17:34:00.000+10:00

For many people, just getting through life is their goal. Maybe to get their dream car or a house, wife and some kids (not necessarily in that order!). Maybe to earn $100,000 a year and travel the world. Own a yacht, business, a race horse. Everyone has a different goal in life. As a Christian, my goal is to serve the Lord. For me, serving incorporates many things; obeying, following His commands, serving others, etc. I went to the Christain Union at uni on Wednesday and the talker guy said that one of our goals should be to die a Christian. I reckon that is a pretty good goal to have. You might be thinking that that is an easy goal, but it is so easy to fall away.
I have been reading Philippians (a nice short book!) and I found a verse.
Chapter 3 Verse 14
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Then verse 15
All of us who are mature should take such a view of things...
This is what I have been pondering lately. I am still unsure as to what these verses mean. They probably mean something different to each person. Feel free to comment on what you might think these verses are saying or if you have any inside knowledge for me.

P.S. you might be thinking that this is unlike me to write seriously because I always write random things. But, since I never write seriously, this post is actually very random, more random than my random posts. Get it? Finally, I would like to make a public apology to anyone that I might of offended because of what I have written on my site or commented about on other peoples sites.

Dodgy Man

2005-04-24T17:58:00.000+10:00

A dodgy Hungarian man. Notice the Hustler magazine in the plastic bag.

What am I?

2005-04-22T16:17:00.000+10:00

After all this confusion about who I am, I forgot who I am. I have been Jewish, Bangladeshi, a rock, and various other things. I decided to do some research and came to the conclusion that I am not this.

New York New York!!

2005-04-21T20:51:00.000+10:00

This guy thought he was good, untill i started pulling some moves!!

Maths Rap

2005-04-20T19:39:00.000+10:00

I'm sitting in math
so bored I could sleep
to fall so deep
I just want to leap...
out of here
then I would cheer
perhaps go for a beer
there are pubs everyone
it doesn't matter which one
I really don't care
the formulas are freaking me out
I want to scream and shout
at the trendy guy infront
with his beenie and faded shorts
I reckon someone should sort...
him out
like the girls with the 5 inches of makeup
and their tops which show their 'A' cup
makes me mad
its all so sad
2m-1
I don't understand
Taylor Polynomials suck
I'm going to have to duck
out of here!!

New poll

2005-04-18T15:54:00.000+10:00

I am not trying to offend anyone.

Comment on this

2005-04-18T15:21:00.000+10:00

I just finished my first math test. Potentially it was only worth 15% of my final grade, but it was still enough to stress over. I don't know why I worry so much about a test worth 15% and I hardly think about an essay worth 30%. Anyway, I think it went alright. It was harder than I thought it would be but I figured most of it out.
Today I was talking to my Honk Kong friend Hollis and he was telling me about his high school. His friends worked it out that it is cheaper to buy one 'e' rather than a lot of grog. I don't know why he thinks I care about all the drugs hes taken. Was he trying to show off?
Another thing that has been annoying me is the amount of people that have asked me if I am Jewish. I also have been asked if I was Finnish and Scottish. All because of my name. People ask where it is from and I tell them its Hebrew, from the Old Testament. Some other cocky bastards have been calling me 'rock' because Mica is also a type of rock. Apparently fools gold. Looks a lot like slate. So, for people who don't know, my name means 'who is like God?' Is it supposed to be a trick question?
(The guy next to me just farted and it seriously stinks!!).
I went to see Sodastream last wednesday night. They are one of my favourite bands. After the show, the vocalist, pianist, guitarist came up and spoke to me. So exciting. I think he remembered me from the last time I saw them which was over a year ago. He is the cousin of one of my friends.
Mine and Daniels second home brew is reall good. A Coopers dark ale. I really am a fan of beer.
I was talking to a guy 20 minutes before maths started and he hadn't studied at all. He was asking me to teach him and I didn't want to so I said that I had no idea how to do it. That was only partly true.
Thats my life and thats my story.
Now that I have no homework assignments due for a while I will be able to post more regularly. And we are getting broadband. Just a quick plug for Nick Drake. Check out his music, it is really good.

New New Poll

2005-04-11T21:55:00.000+10:00

Want your voice heard? VOTE NOW!!!

Disclaimer: Your voice actually won't be heard.

2005-04-10T12:30:00.000+10:00

Holidays in Australia. Hope my sisters don't mind. I am so cute!!

Should I feel bad?

2005-04-10T11:41:00.000+10:00

Thanks to everyone who has been commenting on my site.
The other day at work, the new boss came up to me and Ching (my Asian work mate) and told us that he needed to talk to us. Straight away I was packing myself. I thought that I had done nothing wrong, but bosses can complain about anything. Ching went in first and when he came out he didn't look happy. I then went in and the boss told me that I wasn't in trouble which was a relief. He asked me if I could do a Friday morning shift (6-10). He then said that he told Ching that there was no more work for him. Apparently Ching has been working to slow. The boss also told Ching that my hours had been cut down to 3 a week when I'm actually doing 10. He obviously didn't want Ching to feel too bad. I went outside and was talking to Ching and I told him that my hours had been cut to 3 because that is what the boss told me to say. It was a blatent lie, but I din't want him to feel worse than what he already did. Now i feel like the worst bloke. Is what I did wrong? I feel guilty so it probably was wrong.
On a lighter note, I wrote a fairly poor essay. so stupid of me to leave to the last night. I had to read 4 articles and compare them to an essay that was written a couple of centuries ago. When I qouted one of the articles I wrote 'he said...' It turns out the writer is a female so I definitly lost points there. I wrote that the same day that my brother (perrin) went missing. Mum and dad were freaking out because he was supposed to meet dad at 3.30pm and he still wasn't home at 7pm. Turns out that he got to the meeting place at 4, then waited around till 5, then caught a train into the city and out again. He seriously was not thinking.
Its April and so hot and I have lost my voice (maybe a good thing). Thanks to everyone who has voted on my minipoll.
I also had organic beer yesterday. Glen Fern from New Zealand and Glenbar from Australia. Really good.

Anyone interested?

2005-04-03T13:09:00.000+10:00

If you are looking for some good quality real estate then click here.

Another New Poll

2005-04-01T17:42:00.000+10:00

I have another new poll so ch-ch-check it out. And vote, The country needs you!

So good

2005-03-31T21:15:00.000+10:00

Cat Stevens - Sad Lisa Lyrics

She hangs her head and cries in my shirt
She must be hurt very badly
Tell me what's making you sadly
Open your door, don't hide in the dark
You're lost in the dark, you can trust me
'Cause you know that's how it must be

Lisa, Lisa
Sad Lisa, Lisa

Her eyes like windows tricklin' rain
Upon her pain getting deeper
Tho' my love wants to relieve her
She walks alone from wall to wall
Tho' I know she likes to be near me

She sits in a corner by the door
There must be more I can tell her
If she really wants me to help her
I'll do what I can to show her the way
And maybe someday I will free her
Tho' I know no one can see her

Things that make me MAD

2005-03-31T20:43:00.000+10:00

Once again I must apologise for not writing. I am actually not apologetic. The other night I watched all 3 Lord of the Rings movies (extended versions-almost 12 hours long). I fell asleep for 2 hours in the last movie and then at the end of the night (3.30am) I apologised for falling asleep. Then I thought about it and I realised that I wasn't sorry at all and I was actually glad that I fell asleep. So I took back my apology.
There are quite a lot of things that make me mad, but only a few things that make me really mad. I can't stand people who share towels. With your wife/husband its probably ok but not with a friend or sibling. But sharing toothbrushes is worse. Apparently, teeth and tongues have the most bacteria on them (plaque, tartar). Its just feral. My brother just reminded me that speedos make me mad. I HATE speedos. I unforntunatly made the school swimming team in my final year and so I went to the inter-school swimming thing. We had to wear speedos. I would wear my towel around my waist until I had to get on the starting blocks. Not that i have anything to be ashamed of...if you get my drift! Anyway, I really disagree with them. Also pink shirts on guys make me mad. Do they actually like the colour? All I know is that the queer pamphlet at uni had pink flamingoes on it...
Another thing is Medieval Europe. It is such a boring subject. All the girls in my tutorial think they are so smart, actually they are probably just trying to impress me. Speaking of girls, why can't a lot of them throw tennis balls or cricket balls well? I am not trying to be sexist or a misogynist (I really wanted to use that word).
My boss at work got the flick. It was about time because he really didn't do much. Tomorrow I start at 6am so I will be getting up at 5.15 which is way too early.
Ahhh life. How routinely boring...
Please comment and tell me things that make you mad and I will compile a list. If you think of being a smart arse and writing that I make you mad, don't bother. Your so lame.
Everyone should listen to Sad Lisa by Cat Stevens. It is such a brilliant song. Especially *Em*.
I am going to be wrecked in the morning.

Fat Face

2005-03-18T17:10:00.000+11:00

I miss my wisdom teef.

2005-03-18T16:53:00.000+11:00

Nanda Devi on my back! My tattoo.

2005-03-17T20:06:00.000+11:00

Finally some pictures.

Today

2005-03-15T20:20:00.000+11:00

Firstly, happy birthday to my brother in law Steve.
I am in a lot of pain right now. At work I was putting stuff on some high shelves so to reach them I had to climb onto the second shelf. I'm actually not supposed to climb on them at all because of some random OH&S policy. Who are they anyway? So, when I was finished I launched myself off the shelf I was standing on and onto the ground, (that was my plan). But my trolley handle bar got in the way of my butt and the air. BANG! My buttocks crunched against the bar. I could hardly walk afterwards. I am still in pain now, even though I'm on a cushion. Damn bars. Who invented them anyway?
In one of my lectures recently, I saw a guy drinking a beer. I really respect that.
Also today at work all the regional store managers came in and my boss was freaking out. I know this because he was atleast pretending to do work. They were all satnding near the cardboard crusher and I just happened to have some cardboard to put in it. I went to our delivery truck driver and I told him that I was too intimidated to walk up to them. He told me not to be because they were all "maggots, holden driving maggots". They all had latest model Holden Commadores.
Last thing. Another guy was using the forklift to put a pallet full of big electrical stuff on the highest shelf. But, he crashed the pallet into the deep fryers which came flying down (probably broken now but the box still looks ok). While sitting in the forklift he couldn't catch any (not that you would want to), so he stuck out his foot. I don't know what he was trying to achieve. It would of probably broken his foot. He then proceeded to back the forklift into the shelves behind him. It was very funny. It would of been more funny if he had of knocked tv's down.
Keep voting on my poll.

New Minipoll

2005-03-14T20:37:00.000+11:00

I have a new minipoll now so everyone vote. Thanks.

Random

2005-03-14T15:28:00.000+11:00

My minipolll is gone so too bad for you if you missed out. I'm at uni again but this time I didn't follow a random guy to this computer room. I found it all by myself after going around in circles for a while. Today is a public holiday but not for us hard working uni students. I have finally met the girl I was stalking. Her name is Hilary Slater and her name was above mine on two of my tutorial lists. She wasn't what I expected (or she wasn't what I wanted to expect she was...make sense?). So I started a new mission today. There was a really bored girl about 5 seats from mine in maths so I started writing her notes. I didn't know who she was and I still haven't spoken to her. (The girl next to me just got told off for not handing in her student card when she came into this room). My famine tute finshed an hour early this morning so I had a 2 hour break. I went to my Hong Kong friends house and he made me noodles for lunch.
Today the uni bar is closed so no monday lunchtime beers for me. On saturday I had to work all day stacking shelves at kmart and there was 2 of us using the one scanner. I asked my boss if it was productive for 2 people to use one scanner so he made me take stickers off shelves for 2 hours. The other crap thing was Eminem being played for almost three hours. Talk about pissing off. In all, I reckon its getting better. Just have to meet some more people that I can use for my breaks at uni.
By the way, I really did get a tattoo.

Uni

2005-03-09T11:11:00.000+11:00

Uni is not what its cracked up to be. It doesn't consist of spending all free hours at the pub drinking with your new friends. I have had to try hard with people but I have met some new people (I followed a guy from my maths tute to this computer room). My subjects are fine, my timetable sucks and my maths tute was like yera 12 methods (I have no clue whats going on). Plus, Melbourne uni is like a maze of tall buildings and random lawns. There are Raymond, Richard and Random Smack buildings. I still walk around with my map, trying to hide it so I don't look like an idiot. I have had three tutes so far. You can tell which people think they are brilliant scholars for getting into Melb uni (number 1 in Aus, 22 in the world!!). I keep my mouth shut. There isn't much room for the guy with the random comments. It is cool being in the city, except that its over 2 hours of travel a day. I don't mind the lectures and tutes, its the inbetween hours that I hate (like now). On monday I went to the pub at lunch had had a Coopers by myself because there was no one to drink with no one yet but i'm working on a couple of people).
Thats my life at the moment. Uni 5 days a week and work 2 afternoons and a saturday. I'm bored of it all already.
I will try and be more consistent with my writing. Every first year thinks they are the smartest person alive and definatly smarter than thier friends who got into Monash. I told one guy how I missed out on getting into arts thats why i'm doing science and his reply was "atleast you got into Melbourne". Makes me sick.
Oh and some more news, i got a tattoo.

Minipoll

2005-02-21T20:53:00.000+11:00

I have a minipoll under the links section on the sidebar. Please vote. I will put a new one on every week if this one goes well. Cheers. Thanks Steve for the idea.

Check this out

2005-02-19T16:51:00.000+11:00

The trouble in Nepal is getting worse. Check this out to find out more.

Sign

2005-02-17T20:13:00.000+11:00

What do you know about the hammer and sickle? Click here.

Work

2005-02-17T19:38:00.000+11:00

I have started work at a Kmart warehouse in Mitcham. Basically its getting the overstock from Kmart stores and storing them in the warehouse. But it gets exciting when there is an order to fill and we have to get stock from shelves and pack them away to be sent to stores. Today there was this guy working whose name was Adam. He had a half bleached head. This is the smoko conversation.

Adam: I've got this massive 21st Friday night. Its going to be huge, 250 people are invited, I was the 4th person invited, plus there will be heaps of extras. Me mates call it Friday night fight night. What are yous doing on the weekend?
Micah: A 21st on sat night.
Alex (good bloke), chips in: I don't reckon I could name 250 people.
Adam: I reckon there are 200 people that I could call up and they would want to do something with me. The people in my area are close.
Micah: What area?
Adam: Eltham
Micah: Oh yeah, I live there on Mt Pleasant road.
Adam: So you know about the Pitt St parties?
Micah: I think I've heard them a few times.
Adam: Have you ever driven past the next day? Cop cars turned over, rubbish everywhere.
Micah: Yeah...
Adam: So do you know...(He named heaps of people. I knew a few of them but nodded to more). You must know Nathan Richardson. Its his 21st I'm going to.
Micah: I went to his 18th.
Adam: How good was it?! Fights everywhere, probably a few hundred people there.
Micah: Some dudes head got smashed into a window right next to me.
Adam: Yeah, it was me who kicked his head.
Micah: Goodone...(absolute smack)
Later on...
Adam: So who do you hang around with?
Micah: Thinking: Who do I know that he would know? Probably noone...stuff it. I named some of my friends.
Adam: I don't know those guys...

So much smack happens at work. I spoke some Hindi to my boss and he loved it, then he randomly started speaking Hindi to another worker who just looked at him. But work is actually quite good, if you don't mind working by yourself.

Michael

2005-02-15T20:10:00.000+11:00

Michael Jackson is just misunderstood. How can anyone with a nose like this be taken seriously?

Wierd girl and expensive beer

2005-02-14T18:05:00.000+11:00

I went to the city with Daniel on the weekend and we really felt like a beer. It was around 5.30pm so there weren't too many places open yet. We stopped at this little wine shop outside parliament and asked for a beer. They had nothing on tap so we bought two bottles of Little Creatures Pale Ale (from Western Australia). I won't tell how much they cost, I want people to guess how much it was for the two beers.

I went to the Saint Kilda Festival which was absolutly hopeless. The market wasn't very good and there were too many drunk people (even though it was a dry zone) so I couldn't even see the performers. On the train some random girl was making faces at me. She was probably 17 or 18 and acted like she was 4 or like she thought I was 4. I didn't even know her and she stuck her tongue out at me (a massive one) and then hid behind her newspaper. She then came and sat near me and said: "Hi, I'm wierd. Well, most people think I am". After complimenting me on my green Indian pants she told me how she lived in Crete for six months and went to Amsterdam for a week. So random. I am looking forward to catching the train twice a day so I can meet other random charcters.

Random Label

2005-02-11T20:47:00.000+11:00

Since my operation I have been on antibiotics so I'm not able to drink any of mine and Daniels home brew, which is surprising good. Coopers Draught. On my medication bottle it says: Do not take alcohol while undergoing treatment with this medicine unless otherwise advised by your doctor or pharmacist.
What sort of doctor would advise someone to drink alcohol while on antibiotics? In what situation would anyone do that?

Fat Face

2005-02-09T18:56:00.000+11:00

My face is very fat.
Swollen in fact.
Can't chew,
Tablets make me want to spew.
I have liquid meals,
I definatly got the raw deal.
Watching movies all day, (Troy is useless)
would rather be earning some pay (at Kmart)
People laugh at my face
Nothing else to rhyme
running out of time
stuff this,
got to take my pills...

Wisdom

2005-02-07T19:39:00.000+11:00

Today I had my operation. The removal of three wisdom teeth (where's the fourth?). I had to rock up at Epworth Hospital by 8 am. I was really excited because I got to wear the white hospital gown with the split down the back, which was fairly revealing and I got a wristband with my details on it. Also little slippers and something to cover my hair. The guy that was to give me my anesthesia was fairly annoying, making all these stupid jokes which he clearly uses for every patient. I then went to a waiting room and sat in a nice comfy armchair. A nurse came and got me and led me to the surgery room where there were atleast 5 other people to help with the operation. I asked the lady if I could get the gas, but I got an injection instead. I only had time to say "This stuff smells funny", then I was out of it.
I woke up in the recovery area with a very numb face and a drip in my arm. A nurse came over and I told here that I needed to urinate. She gave me a bottle and nothing came out. I tried again 10 minutes later and again nothing came out. Maybe I was nervous, I have never used a bottle before. I was busting by now so a nurse got me a wheelchair and wheeled me to the toilet. It was so wicked being wheeled around.
Finally got home and my face is still numb. Its been atleast 10 hours since the procedure and my tongue feels about 3 times biggger than normal and my bottom lip has no feeling at all. Obviously I can't chew and even swallowing is difficult. But, I am in no pain at all because of the numbness. I am having to take three different antibiotics/pain killers. I even have to set my alarm for midnight and then 4 am to take them.
I'm not swollen too much but tomorrow I will probably be bigger.
I have also been offered a job at Kmart. A lot is happening.
Cheers.

Anger

2005-02-03T15:25:00.000+11:00

Last night a couple of friends came over (I won't mention any names). One of them came into my room and sat down on my chair. About a minute later we hear a crack. He had been sitting on a new picture I got from my grandparents and the frame had cracked. To his credit, he did apologise, but he he still had the cheek to say "what was it doing on your chair?". This wasn't just any picture, this was a black and white photo of the Nepali Himalayas and I love mountains. Also, I don't know how he didn't realise it was there. The chair was cane and the frame glass...??!!
Anyway, I just needed to vent my frustrations. Things like this really make me annoyed.

Mujahidin

2005-02-02T20:30:00.000+11:00

Holy warriors. The name refers to Afghan guerrillas who fought against Russian occupation of Afghanistan in the 1980s. Osama bin Laden joined the U.S.-based movement in 1983. Shahadah: Declaring that there is no God but Allah and that Muhammad is his prophet.
Fighters of a jihad, a Muslim holy war; Afghan freedom fighters.
A military force of Muslim guerilla warriors engaged in a jihad; "some call the mujahidin international warriors but others just call them terrorists"

Story 2

2005-01-31T20:55:00.000+11:00

Achmed was only 12 at the time, but he had enough problems to last him a life time. He couldn't read or write english and his speech was terrible. Fortunatly he wasnt English so it wasnt a problem that he knew none. He was living as a street rat in rural Dijibouti. He had to steal to survive and his daily exercise was escaping from the local bandits (cops) down to the sewer pipes. Here he would often hide till nightfall when he would come out and sleep anywhere safe under the stars. He hated sleep, always the same dream about his parents leaving him when he was 6. They can't be fully blamed, Achmed did have an obvious "problem" that couldn't easily be ignored. Achmed was a mutant. When his mother was pregnant, she had been exposed to illegally dumped Russian nuclear waste, and as a result, Achmed had been born not with two legs, but three. Marked with this extra leg, the bandits had taken a peculiar interest in him, deciding he was an angel of the devil, a curse they must rid themselves of. Yet no matter how hard Achmed tried, he could not sever the hideous extra leg . But not only was Achmed a mutant, he also had a peculiar mark on the back of his neck.
"QQ". This brand was deeply burned into his skin, at least 1cm deep. Achmed could not remember how he had had this brand and had often wondered how he had received it. Every so often, the brand would glow red, like fire. Achmed would be sent into an animal like state. Crawling on all fours and snarling like a snow leopard in heat, Achmed would roam the streets and commit atrocious acts. This was the work of his master, The Great Jub-Jub. Achmed had no memory of his animal-states nor did he know who The Great Jub-Jub was. But The Great Jub-Jub knew him, yes, he knew Achmed well. Ever since that night, 6 years ago, when Achmed was running through the streets of Dijibouti, crying out his parents' names.

People, keep writing more parts to the story.

Things

2005-01-31T20:25:00.000+11:00

Sorry I havent posted for a couple of days but I'll fill you in on some random things that have been happening. Firstly, on my flight from Qld to Victoria I found a bug on my bag so I kept it as a pet until after take off. I signaled to the flight attendent and asked her what to do with it. She freaked out and told me to put it on the ground but we binned it instead. Then a random chick opposite me 9-ironed in with "there are bugs everywhere". Talk about rude! who asked her anyway?
Then went to the Big Day Out which was sweet as. Got to see alot of wicked bands including The Hives, The Music, John Butler Trio and The Streets. In the mosh pit for The Hives, I was stepping on peoples thongs that had come off their feet while dodging blown up condoms. (You could do a sex and drug survey for a free drink and some condoms. It was good to see people using them for their proper purpose!). Anyway, I was so excited about The Streets. One track has a chorus that I thought a British chick sang but it turns out it was a massivly buff black dude who came running out with no top on. They were also giving brandy to people in the front row.
Now its tuesday and I've had another random day. I had an interview at 9am in a Kmart warehouse in Mitcham. I got to drive on my favourite road by myself for the first time (Springvale). I had an Indian guy talk to me and he was telling me how he can "read people". I was thinking that he might me a part time fortune teller, but it turns out that he reckons he can tell good people from bad. I was a good sort. He also said that my parents "must be very proud of me". He doesnt even know me, and his name is Hik.
Then I went into the city to enrol and followed the Asian students to the science section because I had no idea. I had to find a certain building, but I kept going in circles (always ending up in the food section). My attention was drawn to a desk with some people trying to con youngsters to go on the orientation camp. "The bill covers all drinks and there will be nudie runs". Yay! Then I made a fool of myself by talking to them in the middle of the automatic doors. They kept closing on me and I had to push them open and the whole desk of people were laughing at me.
I finished off well. I am officially enroled in a bachelor of science degree. I also got a student union card which gets me 16% off the entrance fee to Dreamworld. Dammit, I paid full price 3 days ago.
Enough posting for now.

Geschichte

2005-01-27T22:59:00.000+11:00

Nicht sicher, wenn dies arbeiten wird, aber ich werde den ersten Absatz von einer Kurzgeschichte schreiben. Dann will ich Sie, das nächste zu schreiben, und ich werde hat gewählt das beste. Dann werde ich republish beide und wir werden es von dort nehmen.
Achmed war nur 12 zu der Zeit, aber er hat genug Problem gehabt, ihn eine Lebenszeit zu dauern. Er könnte nicht lesen oder könnte Englisch schreiben und seine Sprache war schrecklich. Glücklich er wasnt Englisch damit es wasnt ein Problem, den er keinen gekannt hat. Er lebte als eine Straßenratte in ländlichem Dijibouti. Er musste stehlen zu überleben und seiner übt täglich entkam von den örtlichen Banditen (Polizisten) zu den Abwasserkanalrohren hinunter. Hier würde er oft bis Nachteinbruch verstecken, wenn er irgendwo sicher unter die Sterne würde herauskommen und würde schlafen. Er hat Schlaf, immer der gleiche Traum um seine Eltern gehasst, die ihn verlassen, als er 6 war. Sie können nicht völlig getadelt werden, hat Achmed ein offensichtliches "Problem" gehabt, das nicht leicht ignoriert werden könnte..

2005-01-27T22:54:00.000+11:00

the chad

Story

2005-01-27T10:43:00.000+11:00

Not sure if this will work but I am going to write the first paragraph of a short story. Then I want you to write the next and I will chose the best one. Then I will republish both and we will take it from there.

Achmed was only 12 at the time, but he had enough problems to last him a life time. He couldn't read or write english and his speech was terrible. Fortunatly he wasnt English so it wasnt a problem that he knew none. He was living as a street rat in rural Dijibouti. He had to steal to survive and his daily exercise was escaping from the local bandits (cops) down to the sewer pipes. Here he would often hide till nightfall when he would come out and sleep anywhere safe under the stars. He hated sleep, always the same dream about his parents leaving him when he was 6. They can't be fully blamed, Achmed did have an obvious "problem" that couldn't easily be ignored...

Chad

2005-01-27T10:26:00.000+11:00

My brother in law Steve and I have been making raps and one line goes: Our home is like baghdad but not like Chad. So I've been thinking about Chad and I knew nothing about it so I made it my mission to find out about it. This just some of the information I found out but I will keep posting more about the Chad later.

Full country name: The Republic of Chad
Area: 1.28 million sq km
Population: 9 million
Capital City: N'Djamena (pop 700,000)
People: 200 ethnic groups including the Sara, Bagirmi and Kreish (31%), Sudanic Arabs (26%), the Téda or Toubou (7%) and the Mbun (6.5%)
Language: French, Arabic
Religion: Muslim (44%), Christian (33%), local tribal beliefs (23%)
Government: republic
Head of State: President Idriss Déby
Head of Government: Prime Minister Moussa Faki Mahamat
GDP: US$7.5 billion
GDP per capita: US$1,000
Annual Growth: 2.9%
Inflation: 15%Major
Industries: cotton, meat packing, brewing, natron (sodium carbonate), soap, cigarettes
Major Trading Partners: Portugal, France, India, Germany, Cameroon, South Africa

If anyone finds out random things about Chad then could you comment on this post.

Random Email

2005-01-25T08:29:00.000+11:00

I recieved this email from one of my friends. It was so random that I thought it deserves to be on my site.
Has anyone ever scrunched your ear together in a tight grip, pulled out your hair, sratched and pinched and dig their nails into your arm, thrown punches at you, called you a bastard and a teenage hoolagin- who is trying to steal their singlet while calling for their daddy (who has probably been dead for 40 years) and thrown their teeth accross the room at you?
Has anything like this happened to anyone else? Any other random work stories?

Bird Smack

2005-01-24T17:31:00.000+11:00

Today, my sisiters classroom got invaded by a random bird. It not only flew in, but proceded to smack into all the walls and windows and then crap on all the desks and tables and even on the white board. What a random thing to happen. Has anything random like that happened to you?

Ethan Sellers

2005-01-24T11:07:00.000+11:00

The first name i came up with for my blog site was random smack, but it was already taken by some random guy called Ethan Sellers. I went to his site because i thought it would be funny but this guy had only done one post and that was in november. Things like that make me so mad. If you are going to have a blog site with a good name then you should use it or delete it so other people who actually want to post something can use it. Anyway, Daily Random Smack is a site dedicated to all things random.

2005-01-24T10:55:00.000+11:00

A random smack photo from England.